Panda hat!
CREATIVE FRUSTRATION!!
When one day you pick up a pen and you can just draw exactly how you want to - other days you cannot.
Then there are the days you pick up that same pen and write, you decide you want to write a book - but you’re not consistently good enough to do that either, just like the drawing.
I’m a bloody inconsistent person with my stupid up’s and down’s and I hate it, but I can’t help it because that’s just part of my personality. I’m not consistent enough to be an artist, not consistent enough to be a writer.
- but, regardless of the lack of title - I do write and I do draw, and I’m a Jon that does them things.
Unfortunately there isn’t a recognized qualification in being a ‘Jon’, unlike being a poet, an author or an artist - so for now I’m trying to make do with being an inconsistent loser with no money and barely any independence. BOOO!
I hope things change sometime, by whatever means.
Somebody re-assure me please!
Picasso once said - ”If you know exactly what you’re going to do, what’s the good in doing it? Since you know, the exercise is pointless. It is better to do something else.”
Please somebody re-assure me here……. tell me, what are the advantages of the drawings I have done today?
So I can draw a portrait and make it look like somebody……. what’s the point when it already exists as a photograph?
Please somebody tell me that what I’m doing is worth it! If it pleases you - tell me, if there are benefits, let me know them! Having a bit of a panic, thinking ‘Is what I’m doing worth anything?!’
So what, I can draw a pretty picture……… charming.
Having some ME time. It’s nice to get back to yourself after drawing other people
Work in progress!
(C) Jon Kvedaras
At the beginning of my sketchbook I have these rules tailored to moi!
TURN TO THIS PAGE
STOP, BREATHE, REFLECT
- Let go of heavy things if possible - be self aware of your fists, often holding onto weight we are unaware of.
- Don’t pretend to be ‘cool’ when you are not. You need to find somebody that loves you regardless of your insecurities.
- Be thankful. Remember all that you are blessed with.
- Remember you are sturdy. You are real. You are strong. You are you.
- Do not compare yourself to others. THIS IS WHERE YOU GO WRONG.
- Think of what you want - Children, partner, career. If they are going to exist you need to live for them. Imagine you are working towards your future loves.
- Do not forget, it is hard to control how we feel but we have control over our actions.
- If someone can’t make the effort to be in your life, they don’t deserve to be there.
- Just keep swimming. Don’t stay still, journey on.
- It’s okay if you forget, fail, mess up, make mistakes. Do not be too harsh on yourself. You are only human, and you beat yourself up to much!
- Consider making a drastic change.
- Let go of what others think of you. Besides, how do you know what others think?
Lastly, in the bottom left corner
BREATHE. Be happy, but its also okay to feel unhappy. Just live in the present and remember that nothing stays the same forever.
